Thursday, July 20, 2017

Joy in the Morning

If you read my last post, you may have thought I needed a trip to the psych ward. Honestly, I was feeling like I did. But if you read carefully and noticed the tenses, you may have been aware that my dark night of the soul was already beginning to pass by the time I penned that essay.

During my ordeal, a couple of songs by Sawyer Brown crossed my mind. I googled then, found them on YouTube, and listened to them with tears. Some of the wording describes with shocking accuracy what I was enduring:

      Like clown I put on a show
      The pain is real even if nobody knows
      And I'm crying inside and nobody knows it but me

Tuesday morning I dragged out of bed and met John at Twin Rivers Recreation Center. I wasn't sure I could swim at all, but I was willing to give it a go because I could push down with the palm of my hand and feel no pain in the shoulder. I didn't do much, but I did swim for the first time in over three weeks. The total was a mere 500 meters of swimming and 500 of kicking. But I was in the water, I was happy, and hope had returned. "Hoped deferred," the Bible says, "maketh the heart sick, but a longing fulfilled is a tree of life" (Proverbs 13:2, KJV).

The shoulder was only mildly uncomfortable on the recovery phase and only then for a few strokes. Nevertheless, I didn't not, would not, pull the water hard. It was like my brain had a governor on my arms. Slow, easy, 50 meters at a time. But it was wet and wonderful. Now I feel like I really am on the way back. The biceps tendons in the shoulder are still sore and the backside of the joint is still tight and sore when I move in certain ways. But I could pull without any negative sensation.

Not only did I swim Tuesday, but Wednesday morning I awoke to a "Bing" from my cell phone. It was MJ Staples. Her message: "Woo hoo!! It's official!" I didn't have to ask what she was referring to but immediately went to the Marathon Swimmers Federation website to see under their news section that the latest documented swim was Chicot Challenge VI. That was a real kick in the pants. 

Now I am drinking coffee after a good night's sleep. Jeff is beside me, snoring. CC. is on the edge of the bed, sleeping like only a cat can. Life is good. "Weeping may endure for a night, but joy cometh in the morning" (Psalm 30:5).