Jim Bob Snuck Up

"Woah." I startled. "I didn't hear you come in." It was Jim Bob and he had walked into the backyard without me hearing or noticing until he sat down on the empty bench beside me.

"You didn't hear that gate open? You going deaf?"

"Just distracted, I guess." I was making some notes in a spiral notebook.

"What you working on?"

"The beginnings of a short story. Or maybe a novel."

"Bout what?"

"The Long Zanger and the Forty Lap Kid."

"A western?"

I smiled big, putting my notebook on the reverse hyper machine and reaching for my coffee. "You need coffee?"

"I'm good. So what did you guys do yesterday?"

"We had an Association of Sports Strongmen deadlift meet."

"Oh boy. Pray tell."

Well, the Forty Lap Kid, er uh, Tyler set an all-time world record at, at, at drum roll . . . 450 pounds."

"Woah dude!"

"Yeah, we had fun."

"You had fun? Jay Unver here?"

"Yeah, I had fun too, and Jay Unver was here to witness, write, and whatever."

""So don't hold me in suspense. What did ya pull?"

"I hit 260."

"Boy Howdy. I thought that was your goal for Quadrathon."

"Not anymore."

Things grew silent for a minute or two while he petted Pee Wee.

"One point five five."

"Huh?"

"You want to know how far I ran don't you?"

"Yeah. Why so little?"

"Penny and I are moving this week."

"Still? After how many years?"

"Two. We hope to get close this week. I felt a little pressure to get 'er done and get on over there. Penny was already at the old house."

"Get much done?" he asked.

"A good bit. It's not going to take another two years. Maybe one."

He shot me a look. "Tell me about the pool," he asked.

I got there a few minutes early and saw a fat lady going in. I peeked in and there were two fat ladies. Just starting. I texted the Forty Lap Kid, and we decided to reschedule."

"No swimming?!"

"None."

"I got to go," he said standing up and pouring his coffee out. "I can't drink coffee and dip snuff on that kind of news."