What a Peetiful Day

Friday came around, and I was left to myself. I drank one cup (a big one) of coffee and hit the road. I had earlier in the week hatched the plot to run a loop south of town, out Old Damgard Road, to the levee, down the levee to Highway 49, then through the industrial park, River Road, and home.

The weather was cold and rainy. I loaded my stuff and left the Hideout at 8:45 a.m. shuffling like the old man that I am. When I got onto Humphry Highway, I had to pee so bad that I ducked into the bushes in front of the Country Club and let her go. That was three miles from home. The Old Damgard Road is two miles past the Country Club. I could not make it that far before I had to descend into the bar pit and pee. I will go ahead and answer the question you will ask before you finish reading this. I consumed a normal amount of fluid the day before. Really.

Once on the Old Damgard Road, I was looking for a place to pee. Finally, I ducked into some woods thinking that I must be drained down pretty well by now. Less than a mile later, I was peeing again. Then about a half mile later, I made it to the Pelucia Creek levee where I let loose some serious urine. The distance between Old Damgard Road and Highway 49 on the levee is exactly two miles. I peed twice. No, I did not take, do not have, nor would I swallow a diuretic. 

The Industrial park road to the frontage road on Highway 82 is also exactly two miles. Just after I got on it, yards past the Humane Society shelter, I found some trees to hide behind and pee. Then between Leflore Steel and the Highway Patrol Station, I went down into the ditch so I could hide and take a needed pee. From there, I made my way to the frontage road, up 82, across the highway, and onto River Road. I went east on River Road, over the bridge and onto the river trail where I was able to once more-- you guessed it-- take a pee.

Finally home, I was able to get out of my wet clothes and take a pee. Then I ate a light lunch and watched TV. For the next six hours I did not drink a single drop of anything, but I continued to pee about every thirty minutes. At this point, I was becoming a little worried. Penny and I went out to eat. I had an eighteen ounce steak, a baked potato, and a salad, as well as lots of salsa. I weighed Saturday morning, which is normally my second highest weight of the week. I was down 1.6 pounds from the day before. Normally I would be up three pounds. Even my face looked thinner in the mirror.

I am not a socket rientist, but I think it is pretty obvious that my body was holding a lot of water and decided to let the excess go. Is this something to be concerned about? Sister, let me know. Thank you, Jesus, that I am alive and feel well today.

Oh, I covered 15.85 miles on foot: run = 12 miles, walk = 3.85.